I have always been leery of warning labels. Sometimes they seem totally unnecessary and wasteful. We have all seen the idiot labels that are almost certainly put on products after some litigation nightmare. Like on a blow dryer: not to be used in a shower. Or my personal favorite:
Disposable razor: Do not use this product during an earthquake.
I not sure if it’s true, but it is funny. So I usually take it for granted to simply ignore warning labels and rely on my own common sense.
The other night I was sitting by my fire-pit contemplating life, math, and why my brain vapor-locks, when I noticed that on the table next to me was a good example of a warning label that could frankly save a person’s life.
I use Citronella oil in my Tiki torches because fire is cool and it keeps the mosquitoes high in the air where bats can eat them. I also use citronella oil to quickly start a fire in my my fire pit. Its much cheaper than lighter fluid and rocket fuel is not allways available. I use Beer for other reasons, but somehow beer is usually found in the vicinity of my fire pit. Good thing there is a label that clearly states which one is not for drinking. I do not usually drink enough that this would become a hazard, but I do have guests over occasionally.
Maybe I need a warning lable for my beer:
“Has negative effect as an insect repellent. Not intended as tiki torch fuel.”
This could spawn a whole industry of beer warning labels to be custom made for unique circumstances:
In a bar….. “Don’t eat the mints”
On the prairie….. “don’t pee on skunks”
In the mountains 12K+….. “Your already high, what are you thinking?”
On the beach…. “I know the bottle is made of sand, but recycling doesn’t include burying me on the beach”
In a cowboy bar while listening to a band playing rythem and blues….. “Not effective against chicken wire”
At midnight while watching the movie Warriors….. “Not a musical instrument”
Open to other ideas…