Bull-shit detector

 

Carrie Lowery got me thinking about lying, maybe bullshit is a better word, anyway she got me to thinking and thats inportant. I managed to find seven out of 10 true things about Carrie that were mixed in with ten items of Bullshit.  To me, that means my Bullshit detector was running with a 30% failure rate.  I find this to be completely unacceptable, but it was enough to co-win the contest.

 

Anyway, it got me to thinking about some little nown facts about myself that may trip up some of my readers.  Trying to think of ten little known facts about myself has proved to be easier than creating 10 items that are bullshit detector resistant.  Another handicap is the fact that a few of my readers know me real well.  I am not sure what to do about them, do I come up with stuff that they do not know, or do I just ask them nicely to keep their yaps shut.  On the other hand maybe this would be a good test to see if my bullshit is good enough to fool friends…. Naaaa, just kidding.  There is no way I can fool my relatives or close friends.  So the following people are not allowed to guess.  Archvillain, Spudgun, Caveblogem, Kingslya, and Dad.  All others give it your best shot.

 

So its time to warm up the Bullshit detector….

 

  1. I can juggle four balls at a time.
  2. I am the same height and weight as Michael Jordan.
  3. My first girl friend was over six foot tall
  4. I once saw DEVO in concert.
  5. When I was a child I had a stuffed dog shaped foot stool that I named Barf.
  6. I have a collection of Star Wars Burger King Glasses from 1980.
  7. I got straight A’s in grade school then got D’s in Middle school and High School once I “discovered” Girls.
  8. I once jumped off a gay mans roof into a swimming pool in the nude to impress a girl.
  9. The minister at my wedding switched vows between my wife and I at the last minute and with out our knowledge.  I had to say a much more religious version that I wanted or ruin the wedding.
  10. I once met Larry Niven and he signed my first edition copy of Ring World.
  11. My shortest career was as a chimney sweep, it lasted only a week.
  12. In middle school I had a 3′ pet iguana named Guacamole.
  13. When I was living in England I owned an English springer spaniel named Binkley.
  14. I once spent Halloween night in Sigonella, Italy with a bunch of Seabees.
  15. I spent Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years in Air Force Basic Training.
  16. When I was in High School I worked at Radio Shack and was paid, under the table, with electronic parts.
  17. I have an irrational fear of high places and won’t go above the fifth floor of any building.
  18. My little sister is a six foot two inch blond and works at Macys.
  19. I caught a foul ball while watching a Giants game in San Francisco.
  20. I learned to program in Basic, Pascal, Fortran, and machine code in high school in 1976.

 

It’s my game so I can play it any way I want.  The trick with this one is to detect the ten items in the above list that are bullshit.  Let the comments fly.
Good luck Carrie.

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7 thoughts on “Bull-shit detector

  1. jimsmuse says:

    Thanks for the well-wishes, pf — I had the same problem you did when I did my contest: it’s much easier to think of true things that are strange than it is to think of false things that are as strange as the true things, isn’t it?

    My Personal Bullshit Detector says that: 1,2, 4,6, 7, 11, 12. 13, 17 and 19 are false. Please let me know whether or not I need to take it back to the shop for a tuneup!

    It started by accident, but it’s turning out to be a fun meme. I hope you tag someone else after we pry all of your deepest, darkest secrets out of you over the next day or two! :)

    Outstanding, it looks like you BS detector is calibrated the same as mine. 70% accuracy rate! I will give it another day to see if anyone can get better then post the answers.
    -pf

  2. pannonica says:

    Hi PF –

    Carrie gave me the heads up about your little challenge and, as I was exempted from participating in her original version, I was eager to try yours. I was admonished not to peek at her answers before making my own guesses, so here goes:

    F: 1, 3, 9, 11, 12, 13, 15, 17, 19, 20.

    Thanks for sharing some useless details about your life!

    Not bad. You got six out of ten right. I will post the correct answers and explanations on Saturday or Sunday.
    -pf

  3. Burrowowl says:

    There’s a real difference between a lie and bullshit. A lie is the willful attempt to deceive, to knowingly put forward the untrue as true with the intention of convincing another into a false belief.

    Bullshit, on the other hand, is a willful disregard for the truth in pursuit of some other end. When a politician talks about how brave our soldiers are or how productive our workers are or how devout our worshipers are or how wise the founding fathers were, the truth of his statements is hardly the point. He is trying to sway his audience on the subject of his own character, not their opinions of soldiers, workers, the devout, or American history.

  4. Since I am attempting to manipulate the truth either through stretching, bending, or tweaking, for the purpose of making it difficult to identifying truthful statements with the end purpose of divulging personal information for the entertainment of my readers, I would think that Bullshit is more appropriate. Thus my original statement that I think lying isn’t the right word that Bullshit is a better description. So you going to play my silly game or just bitch about semantics?
    -pf

  5. Layman Pong says:

    3, 7, 12, 13, 17, 18

    I’m a cheatin’ ho-bag.

    Ok, cheatn’ ho-bag, how about guessing on all ten? You only made a half assed attempt with six and you only got four out of thoes right. Man, after knowing me for over 30 years you would think you would do better than that!
    -pf

  6. pannonica says:

    One answer is the difference between “outstanding” and “not bad”? Always a tadpole, never a frog.

    *sob* >RIBBIT< *sob*

    Sorry, I was flashing back to how my grades were received back in High school. If I brought home Cs It was praised as outstanding. Ds were not bad because they were at least passing. So I will elevate your score due to the difficulty of the subject to pretty good. Hows that?
    -pf

  7. pannonica says:

    It’s pretty good.

    · p ·

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